I Kissed Dating Goodbye is a book written by abstinence author, pastor Joshua Harris. He argues that traditional dating is “a training ground for divorce” because it puts people in the habit of quitting relationships when things get tough. However, didn’t intend to talk about Harris nor his crap, just used the title to prod you into reading this:
You understand young people love articles neighboring on love and relationships. As we polish our resumes and rack up extracurricular, we may have forgotten how to love. Do we need a class in dating?
I may be deviating now but before I treat you to a great read nonetheless, may I apologize to Sophia Macharia for breaching the writing style she has always advised me to uphold. That is:
K – Keep
I – It
S – Short
S – Sexy.
Sophia Macharia has been a steadfast supporter, a passionate critic and a dear friend for so long.
Here we go, as a substitute for family and a marker of the young man and woman’s arrival at a new stage of life, university come to serve all our needs: Educational, emotional, bodily as well as social. As we begin a new month, I like to talk about the social service. Realize I love to bring my articles from a personal perspective.
Can say I had a slower transference of allegiance from my village to college, a broader world where we witness real sexual development and acquire manly and womanly identities. Never got closer to ladies or dated any girl in my first and second year. Doesn’t mean I was devoid of confidence, exuberance, enthusiasm, muscular body, handsome face and self-assured stance as hallmarks of my youthful existence.
But I became more aware of myself and environment as I advanced the classes, begun to view the female companionship as an essential and desirable alternative to the company of male university friends. This view somewhat has tempered the influences I have had from my male campus environment and restored manly vigor by allowing me to regain the long pined for society of the unenfranchised sex… Shhhh! And rather than eschewing the heterosexual contact, I have seen it more often than not as a vital corollary to the homosocial relations of my college life.
Heterosexual romance, courting and liaisons, not attachment with other men has hitertho dominated my sexual development. My regulated contact with campus girls at specified times therefore has formed an essential component in the development of my character. So this emphasis on heterosocialability has become nearly as vital to the formation of my undergraduate identity. In essence, my heterosocialability has provided practical knowledge and imparted gentlemanly qualities which are perhaps more necessary and more valued and expected from a husband in the family setup of any household anywhere.
College is a bubble, and that bubble is full of attractive people of the same age all living figuratively and literally on top of each other. A campus full of people in the exact same demographic as you with no curfew in sight equates for most of us to having our first serious relationship around this time. And although this first-love stuff is certainly incredible, dating in college is also total bullshit. It just doesn’t count as reel dating. This is why:
“Lets get hopped up and make some bad decisions!” is the unspoken collegiate mantra. Its a bona fide breeding for bad decisions and this is the time you are supposed to make them, so in a way, casual hookups aren’t really judged the same way as they can be in adulthood.
The truth is, while you may feel invincible, entitled, a pro and even believe you are an actual adult during university, you still have a lot to learn about yourself – and that includes knowing what it means to really love and be loved by someone else.
Happy New Love Month
#Writing Is A Labour Of Love ☺